Friday's WTF Moment: Week's Most Useless Press Release

July 31, 2009
Question mark in Esbjerg, by Flickr user alexanderdrachmann

Question mark in Esbjerg, by Flickr user alexanderdrachmann

We get a lot of press releases here at High Gear Media. Most of them tend to have something to do with, ummmmm, cars. Or at least a related topic, like car parts, or car racing, or car buying. You get the idea.

But occasionally we get one that demonstrates why PR isn't necessarily held in as high regard as it might be if some of its practitioners  weren't quite so fond of mass spamming any e-mail on their media list.

A presumably very nice woman named Elizabeth at [name of large global PR firm redacted] sent us a note to "share" the following news:

"Zebra Enterprise Solutions, a division of Zebra Technologies, has announced the extension of its parent company's partner program by teaming up with RFID Global Solution, Inc (RFIDGS). The partnership gives RFIDGS access to resell RTLS solutions using a range of active RFID products offered by Zebra Enterprise Solutions (ZES)."

The opening sentence of the release that follows isn't much help:  Zebra Enterprise Solutions, a division of Zebra Technologies (Nasdaq: ZBRA), has extended its parent company’s partner program by offering resellers such as RFID Global Solution, Inc. a suite of enterprise solutions to sell to its customers who want to streamline business operations.

What this has to do with cars is a bit unclear to us thus far. And it's going to stay that way, 'cause that's the point at which we hit the delete button.

We did forward it around internally asking if anyone knew WTF this was meant to convey. We simply asked, "What do any of these companies actually MAKE or DO?"

Our favorite reply comes from our always-sober comrade and colleague Bengt Halvorson:, who apparently read more of the release than we did:

Don't you know? They're the company that provides the ISO9940 certification for Process Approval Form BFS33480, which is the required first step to normalize the audit process for TPS reports with a Code Zebra attachment. Duh.

Right. Exactly. Silly us.

[photo by Flickr user alexanderdrachmann]

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