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It’s not so far-fetched, really, that
conditions in the vicinity of Saturn might predispose towards signs of life.
After years of planning and crossed fingers, some very clever engineering is
finally reaping its rewards. Within a murky, gaseous atmosphere, there might
actually be evidence of a living pulse of sorts. Personally, I’ve always thought
that behind Saturn’s moony daydreams lies a real, unfulfilled potential.
As for what could possibly thrive
in the methane-soaked skies enveloping Titan, Saturn’s largest moon, who’s to
say? While a trans-Atlantic team is preoccupied with instant messages from the
Cassini-Huygens space probe, I’m all too happy to exult in my recent discovery
of the new Relay minivan from Saturn Corporation. This is, after all, the first
Saturn vehicle I’ve ever actually admired.
It’s also the first Saturn vehicle
to eschew plastic bodywork for steel panels, and it’s the first Saturn vehicle
to offer prospective customers more instead of less than they might expect.
True, I think it’s disingenuous of Saturn’s moon-eyed marketing department to
resist calling a spade a spade. The press materials describe the Relay as
combining “SUV-like exterior styling with [the] functionality of a mid-van.”
It’s a minivan, for crying out loud. Open your eyes and look at it! (Just what
is a “mid-van” anyway?)
GET J.D. Power Circle ratings for the competition:
2004
Chrysler Town & Country
2004
Honda Odyssey
2004
Toyota Sienna
Semantics aside, the Relay is, for
once, a genuine contender for Saturn. It seats seven and totes a bunch of cargo.
It’s adequately powered, tolerably fuel-frugal and very cleverly supplied with
both standard and optional features. Even in terms of the prevailing (i.e.,
soporific) minivan aesthetic, the Relay is almost eye-catching. Behind the
pug-nosed snout is a nearly cubic cockpit that’s precisely as tall as it is
wide.
Shared pedigree
Sharing its General Motors
pedigree with the Chevy Uplander, Buick Terraza and Pontiac Montana minivans,
the Relay depends on a traditional pushrod V-6 displacing 3.5 liters. Power is
200 horsepower and 220 pound-feet, which may be a far cry from Honda Odyssey’s
255 hp; but Relay’s lighter curb weight helps to compensate. Accordingly, fuel
economy is rated 18 miles-per-gallon/city and 24 miles-per-gallon/highway (using
regular), which is very near the head of the class among minivans
overall.
Saturn fields three versions of
the Relay at base prices ranging from $24,485 for an entry-level
front-wheel-drive version to $30,570 for a better equipped all-wheel-drive
model. My tester represented the third alternative: front-wheel drive with all
the trimmings at a base price of $27,580. The only options were a “power
package” ($995) with power-sliding rear doors and rear parking assist; and the
“safety package” ($545) comprising StabiliTrak traction control and side airbags
up front.
Whereas I question, in this day
and age, the wisdom of offering side airbags and stability control as mere
options, it’s hard to know what to make of other interior features that come as
standard equipment. It is, perhaps, a commentary on our times to note that a
rear-seat DVD theater, with wireless headphones, is installed in every Relay
minivan regardless of price.
Moreover, this DVD player is part
of a clever powered-rail system that runs down the center of the cabin. Saturn
purveys a variety of optional storage boxes, PDA or cellphone holsters and
sunglass bins that clip in and out of these rails. But the masterpiece by far is
the optional (and tongue-tying) “Mobile Digital Media Powered by PhatNoise”
system that also docks into the rails.
For anybody over 25, a little
tutorial is in order: Relay’s PhatNoise option is basically a 40-gigabyte hard
drive library that networks into the minivan’s audio and DVD circuits. It’s
capable of storing up to 10,000 songs in various digital formats or 40 MPEG
movies. Many video games are also compatible, as are audio books transferred
from a PC. The PhatNoise unit features “voice browsing” that identifies
individual songs aurally by title and artist, which the driver can then select
via steering wheel controls. Oh, and don’t forget the XM Satellite Radio option.
Then, if that’s not enough, two different “entertainment sources” can be played
simultaneously to pacify different media constituencies during road trips.
Cargo for men at
work

forum
Why, then, ever leave the vehicle? It may well be that the only
compelling reason to do so is to make way for cargo. The Relay boasts impressive
credentials in this regard as well. Not only are there 27 cubic feet of trunk
space at one’s disposal even when all seven seats are in use but also this
volume grows to 74 cubes, then to 137 cubes as rows three and two are folded
progressively flat.
And I do mean flat, because the
Relay employs an optional under-floor rear storage system whose carpeted lids
are flush with the folded third-row seats. The outcome is a panoply of
permutations for folding some seats while sitting in others, all the while
toting various shapes and sizes of cargo all over town. Or, you can just yank
out the second-row captain’s chairs and the three-person rear bench altogether
and be done with it.
Offsetting all this interior
design ingenuity is a driving feel that is competent, if not inspiring. The
Relay pairs a front independent suspension with a rear torsion axle and
four-wheel anti-lock brakes. Handling isn’t particularly cat-like, but it is
comfy and predictable. The automatic transmission is GM’s time-honored
four-speed Hydra-Matic. Those of us who like to drop out of overdrive from time
to time have to use the shifter; there’s no pushbutton cut-out as on so many
competing vehicles.
Then again, the very fact that
Relay competes effectively against rival minivans represents Saturn’s chief
accomplishment here. Finally, a sensible vehicle from GM’s “different kind of
car company” and well made at that, catering to real world tastes and needs.
Might it be that Saturn and intelligent life are no longer mutually
incompatible?

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GET
Kelley Blue Book Pricing for this vehicle
2005
Saturn Relay
Base
price: $27,580; as tested,
$29,120
Engine:
3.5-liter V-6, 200 hp/220 lb-ft
Transmission:
Four-speed automatic, front-wheel drive
Length x width
x height: 204.9 x 72.0 x 72.0 inches
Wheelbase:
121.1 inches
Curb
weight: 4272 lb
Fuel economy
(EPA city/hwy): 18/24
mpg
Safety
equipment: Dual front airbags, anti-lock brakes
Major standard
equipment: AM/FM/CD player; DVD entertainment system;
OnStar
Warranty:
Three years/36,000 miles