The Week in Reverse

September 22, 2006

One Panamera...two Panamera...hold on, we're feeling a Latin rhythm here.

Has the Governator really given up his now infamous HUMMERs? I mean, that would be like Bill Clinton giving up cigars, right? A man's gotta have a trademark.

Apparently at least a few of you remember who Cher is, why she also owns a HUMMER, and care enough to vote in our off-year ballots. May Liberty shower her blessings on you - or just agree to shower with you.

Meanwhile, Ahnuld's Golden State is suing automakers, including Toyota and Honda, for damages stemming from greenhouse-gas emissions. Predictably, they didn't name Taco Bell to the suit, even though everyone knows it produces far more toxic gases.

Sebring! And you said Chrysler had lost its derring-do! (What exactly is derring-do?)

Our Franco file overfloweth with next week's Paris show previews. There's Mondeo, Touareg, and the only traditionally named superhero, the Avenger. We'll be reporting through sweat-soaked suits from the Expo on Thursday--stay tuned if you can stand the perspiration.

We're so cranky you'd think we hate everything about cars, but in truth, it's only really six things we hate. Seven, if you count goofy names.

Given that Ford's Edge will wear a pricetag of less than $26,000, and the Lincoln version is going to sticker below $35,000, and that gas prices are dropping to $2, calculate how soon it will take Ford to revert to truck-based utes if demand allows. Show your work.

What's a little pot and mushrooms between friends? Okay, now multiply that by about 5 and throw in some Louisiana state police and Willie Nelson. The sitcom pilot practically writes itself.

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